Given a Chance
by Nurenja
Summary: Kendall Knight always loved singing. It was his big dream to sing for his living. After an accident he lost his hearing almost completely. He is about to give up on his dream when one band gives him the chance to prove what he can do.


Nervously I tap my foot on the floor. It is almost time.  
Closing my eyes, I lower my head and take a deep breath. To say I'm nervous is an understatement. My heart is beating fast, my hands are sweating, my legs are trembling.  
Quickly I wipe my hands on my legs. My fingers pierce into my thighs.  
"It's gonna be okay…" I mumble to myself.  
The silence surrounding me normally doesn't bother me. I'm used to it by now. I learned to live with it. But now it is unbearable. It's driving me crazy.  
They – the band – don't know about it. I didn't mention it when I signed up for that audition. It is my dream and in the past months I've always been rejected because of it.  
It's not easy – wanting a music career and being almost deaf.  
Most people think it is just not possible. That I should just give up on that dream.  
I cannot give up on my dream though. I've wanted it since I was five. Music has been my biggest passion since my parents bought me a guitar for my fifth birthday.  
My hearing was perfectly fine at that time. I only lost my hearing when I was fifteen. That's been four years now. I'm able to hear loud sounds, the beat of the music.  
I jump when I feel a hand on my shoulder. I raise my eyes.  
A woman is standing in front of me and looks at me smiling.  
"Kendall Knight? It's your turn."  
Nodding I get up, when I processed what she said. It's really helpful, that I've become good at reading lips. Taking a few deep breaths, I follow her.  
When we enter the other room, I immediately turn my eyes to the right. Three young men are sitting at a table. They stop their talk when they notice me coming in. The woman takes a seat next to them.  
"So." I turn my gaze to the young man on the right. A small smile is plastered on his lips.  
He slightly scratches his head. "Kendall Knight?"  
I nod slightly, not turning my gaze away. He is called Logan, if I remember it right. "It says…" He slightly raises his hand with a sheet of paper in it. "You've been singing for many years. How long exactly?"  
"My parents bought me a guitar for my fifth birthday. I've been singing ever since."  
"You play the guitar?" I nod again. "That's good. That can be helpful."  
He looks down for a second. "Okay, what song are you going to sing?"  
"It's an original. I write songs myself. It's called Parallel."  
The smile on his lips grows wider. "Okay, when you're ready…"  
I carefully look around in the room. I notice a guitar behind me. "Can I…?"  
"Sure."  
I carefully lift it up. Closing my eyes, I strum at the chords.  
I take another deep breath before starting with the song. I lose myself in the music. I can feel the chords vibrating.

_**Counting stars, laying in the grass  
side by side, your head on my shoulder  
We talk a lot about nothing much,  
with every breath we're getting closer**_

_**Parallel, in this universe  
Do we light up our hearts just to watch them burn  
Parallel, I will cross the lines  
Cause maybe tonight the stars align**_

Slowly I open my eyes. Looking at the young men at the table I notice the smiles on their faces. Logan even seems a bit shocked.  
Timidly I let my gaze drop on the guitar. I haven't had that reaction from any of the bands I auditioned for. They were always only half listening – probably because I told them about me being almost deaf before I started singing. Not telling them was probably a good idea – at least for now.  
Maybe it raised my chances. Maybe they will push me away when they find out.  
I have to enjoy this moment for now. Continuing my song, I close my eyes again.  
I lose myself in my song again. Feeling the vibrations of the guitar chords and my voice makes me happy.

_**What if the one who was meant for you  
was all along right in front of you?  
You just didn't see it was there all the time  
got a feeling tonight, yeah  
The stars align  
Stars align  
The stars align**_

I take a deep breath before looking up.  
The young men and the woman are looking at me. Partly shocked, partly impressed.  
Carefully I put the guitar down and look at them again. I nervously bite my lip.  
The shortest, Carlos, is the first one to find his voice again. "That was… wow."  
"You're really good, Kendall. Like, really, really good." James adds nodding after Carlos' comment. "Logan?"  
I turn my gaze to said man. He hesitates for some seconds. I cannot read his expression. It's hard to tell what he thinks.  
"I… I don't know what to say. Your voice is amazing."  
"Thank you…" I whisper.  
I notice Logan lowering his head again and looking at the sheet in his hands. Slowly I let my eyes wander to Carlos and James, then to the woman beside them.  
Some silent seconds pass.  
After some time, Logan raises his head again and looks at me.  
The longer we keep this silence the more nervous I get. James' gaze turns to confusion. His eyebrows furrow and his eyes search Carlos'. He wears the exact same gaze.  
Logan just raises an eyebrow.  
Nervously I bite my lip. The silence is killing me. "Eh, Kendall?"  
"Yeah?" Somehow, I feel like I missed something. Nobody talked. I didn't notice anyone moving his lips. My heart stops for a second. Logan had lowered his head. He probably talked to me.  
"Could you, maybe answer my question?"  
_Brilliant_, I think. _You've made a fool of yourself again._  
"What did you ask?"  
"If you had any experience with singing in a band… Are you alright? You look a bit pale." His gaze turns worried.  
"I- yeah, I'm fine." I begin to stutter. "And no, I haven't had any experience."  
"Is this your first audition?"  
Shaking my head, I quickly look back and forth between the four. "I've been to many, but I was always rejected."  
"Why?" I am not sure if I got the words right. It was such a short statement. I let out a relieved sigh when James keeps talking. "Why did they reject you? It's definitely not because you're a bad singer. You're the best we heard until now. You're far ahead."  
"I…" I swallow hard. I have to tell them. This is the perfect opportunity. I cannot lie to them. Letting out a shaky breath I open my mouth to talk again but Logan interrupts me. "Are you sure, you are alright?"  
"Yes… I… They rejected me because…" I notice the tears welling up in my eyes. They will judge me. I just know they will. Quickly I wipe away a tear that started rolling down my cheeks.  
Logan starts to tense and I notice Carlos standing up. "Because-"  
"Here." Carlos hands me a tissue.  
"Thanks." I wipe over my cheeks. I feel pathetic crying now. I never cried when talking about it. Not even when I was rejected for being deaf. This is the first time I have cried since I learned to live with it. "They rejected me because I'm almost deaf."  
It feels like time stops. Nobody is moving. They are all looking at me with wide eyes – shocked. I realize Carlos even stopped in his tracks when he heard my comment when he was walking back to the table.  
Slowly I take some steps backwards and look at them. My lips begin to tremble slightly and I feel my legs becoming weaker. "Come on, guys." I whisper – probably hardly audible. "Please, say something."  
"Kendall…" I knew it. They will judge me.  
Quickly I turn around and walk out of the room. I can catch someone shouting after me but I don't know who or what the person said.  
Getting out of the building I lean at the wall and bury my face in my hands. My head immediately drops down. I let out a silent sob.  
Why did I even try to audition again? I was already rejected so many times. I stopped counting after reaching 20.  
Maybe everyone was right. Maybe I should just give it up. I won't achieve anything. I will only hurt myself and lower my self-esteem going to more and more auditions and being rejected every time.

I jump when I feel something brushing over my shoulder. Shaking I let my hands drop down and raise my eyes to look at the person in front of me.  
Logan sadly smiles at me. "It's okay…"  
I shake my head and let my gaze drop to the ground again. Immediately his hand is at my cheek and pulls my head up. Quickly I close my eyes.  
I don't want to look at him. I don't want to see yet another hateful, humiliating gaze.  
After some seconds, I feel a second hand at my other cheek. It slowly pats my cheek. I know what he wants to achieve. He wants me to look at him. Shaking my head, I refuse to open my eyes.  
My body tenses when I feel his arms around my waist. He pulls me up and closer to his body.  
One of his hands moves to my head and softly buries itself in my hair.  
Trembling I bury my face in his neck.  
Soothing he strokes over my back. I can feel his jaw moving. He is probably talking to me although he knows I cannot hear him.  
We stay like this for some time. My sobs become more silent the longer we stand there.  
I take a deep breath. My body relaxes and I lean against him.  
He softly strokes over my cheek before pushing me away from him, keeping his hands on my cheeks. His thumb wipes away my tears. I raise my eyes to look at him.  
Against my expectation he slightly smiles at me. His gaze is not hateful. He seems sad, maybe even a bit gloomy. "Do you know what I'm saying?"  
I nod slightly.  
Looking deeply into my eyes he smiles at me. "Why did you run away? It is all okay. We're not going to reject you because of it. You are so special. You're following your dream of singing although you cannot hear. I'm actually impressed. You are amazing. Don't listen to anybody who tells you something different. Don't let anybody pull you down."  
I take a deep breath. "You all looked so shocked. You had the exact same gazes like the others who rejected me. I was scared."  
"You don't need to be scared." Wiping over my cheeks to dry them again, he brightly smiles at me. "Come on." He holds out his hand for me to take. I look at his hand for some time. Hesitating I grab it. He leads me inside again.  
I stop in the door frame when I notice James and Carlos looking at me. Logan slightly tugs at my hand.  
Slowly I turn my gaze at him.  
"It's okay."  
I return the smile that is still present on his lips. Logan pulls me back on the spot. His hand gently pats my back. I look at him questioning when he puts his arm around me and squeezes my hand. He stays at my side and motions to his friends.  
I turn my gaze to them.  
I notice the smile on James' lips. In the corner of my eye I see Logan's lips moving but I keep my eyes locked on his friends. They only nod at what he says. Lowering my head, I close my eyes for some seconds.  
A hand strokes up my arm and stops at my shoulder. It gently shakes me. Looking up next to me I am met by Logan's friendly gaze. "James wants to tell you something."  
Looking over at his friend I tense a bit. This is probably the moment they are going to judge me. Immediately my flight instinct kicks in again. If Logan didn't have his arm around me, I'd probably run away. Swallowing hard I watch James nervously.  
"Why are you scared?"  
The question leaves me dumbfounded. To me it is pretty obvious. Somehow James and Carlos don't see my deafness as a reason. They don't seem to care.  
"I…"  
James' and Carlos' eyes turn to Logan. Hesitating I look at the young man next to me. Looking back at me he continues to talk.  
"He had bad experience with it. He thinks we would reject him just because he is deaf." He gently squeezes my shoulder. "He was rejected many times. He wasn't given a chance."  
I jump when I feel a hand at my other shoulder. Quickly turning my head, I notice Carlos raises his hands in defense. "I'm sorry."  
I didn't notice the two guys got up and walked up to us.  
"It's okay." I whisper, a slight smile on my lips.  
Hesitating he puts a hand on my shoulder again. "We'll give you that chance."  
My jaw drops. Questioning I look at them. "I…"  
"Yes." James smiles at me. "You deserve that chance. You're an amazing singer. You deserve a shot."  
"Thank you." I whisper. A tear starts rolling down my cheek.  
Immediately I feel three pairs of arms around me. Letting out a deep breath I let my head drop on Logan's shoulder. "Thank you."

_Smiling I think back to the day my journey started. Looking down at the crowd I see all the screaming fans. The smile on my lips grows wider. I never expected my life to turn out like this. I was about to give up on my dream when I ran out of the audition room. If Logan hadn't come out and talked to me, I would have stopped auditioning. I would have given up my dream.  
My head turns to the right when I feel an arm around my shoulders.  
Grinning Logan looks at me. I pull him close to me and shortly pat his back. Leaning in I get close to his ear. "Thank you. For everything." I whisper into his ear.  
The questioning gaze quickly leaves his face. Squeezing my shoulder one last time he turns back to the crowd to continue with the next song.  
Going to the audition was definitely the best choice I made in my life… _


End file.
